Kya "Tamasha" hai!

This is going to be one hell of an insane rant, muse, or I don’t know what! Bear with me.


I’ve often been, rather almost always been, rather envious of those who author self-help books; it seemed they’ve always had a Sufi, a saint, a pathfinder, or even if it's just a tarrot-card reader by the roadside, they've had them there for themselves right on time, right at the very corner of the road where they stopped to find their way. The right message on the poster, the right picture, sermon, song, the right thing at the right moment, just what they needed and when! It always, unfailingly, made me feel very little, feel - incessantly - like not being the chosen one, perhaps!

The Little Light of My Life...

This post has also been published in World of Moms!

The Bun in the Oven!!

This has also been published in World of Moms!


I often wonder - now that after four years plus of eventful parenting it all looks like a past as distant as if the rest of my life was not coherent but a past life – as to how did I, we, at all go about it? How did we come at it, at making her? At making our daughter - a blossoming fairytale that she is unfurling every day to be?

My list of Turn-Ons

This has also been published in World of Moms!


Suddenly in a romantic mood, me. 

Well, not romantic exactly. Flirtatious, rather.

So, what do you do when you are thirty-three, married, and a mother of one, and have already noticed the two grey strands as you combed your hair in the morning while rushing for office, and yet cannot but feel flirtatious one fine evening?

Well, you make a list.

Yes.

Who knows, there can well be a next life somewhere sometime, and if your folks remember to bury you along with the list you make today (yes, I refuse to be burnt) you may even find it handy then. Less likely, someday your daughter may need this list for herself. 

Or whatsoever.

But here, I feel flirtatious now, and given my circumstances,  all I can do is make a list. So I will.

Now, coming to the point. What are the things that turn me on in a man?

(Yes, I am heterosexual. Just saying. I don't like guesses.)

1.     First and foremost – Baritone voice

Oh, that’s a killer. Deceptive, yes, but still. I can give up all my demands for looks and intelligence and intellect and poetry writing and reading that a man must, must have, if only he has a voice baritone enough to make up for all that. 

Well, almost!

+ 10 if speaks good English

+ 50 if knows good poems by heart

- 20 if speaks with strong accent

- 50 if the accent is fake

2.     Checked shirts

This one is easy, but a sure win. Checked shirts are sexy. Period.

            + 20 for blue, green, white

            +10 for brown, grey

            + 25 for black and white

 - 50 for fluorescent colours

3.     Moderately tall guy. Five feet eight to five feet ten.

The exact height at which, if we hug, I reach.. well you know! I like that. :/

4.     Frames.

What’s a man without large spectacles and a changed look when you take them off?

+ 5 for rimless ones (are rimless glasses called frames at all?)

+ 10 for Black or Brown frames

+ 15 for thick frames

- 50 for any other colours

5.     Keyboards

I somehow get very impressed when someone don’t have to reach out for the mouse at all while doing stuff at the computer. Very!

+ 10 if also good with writing magical Microsoft Access codes, ones that makes humans redundant at office save for security guards and tea-boys.

- 20 If uses terrible combination on colours on tables or graphs

+ 50 if the cartoons on the Microsoft Powerpoint slides gets across the messages better than the words on them, and with a twist.

Bonus entry –

Putting a hand on my head. Staying there. Like that. For a long, long time. 

(That makes up for most of the above.)

So much for my list. 

What’s yours?

PS: Just as I finish typing this on my handheld and am getting off the cab with a customary "thank-you", comes a "welcome Ma'am" in a, well, noticeably nice voice. Erm, the driver in a checked shirt. And just as I  walk towards the elevator, musing that I should add this fact as a post-script to my this post, comes a "Good evening man" from the security guard. Yup. Checked shirt, thick rimmed black frames. There you go!

PPS: List of Turn-Offs. Coming soon!

PPS: List of Turn-Offs. Came!

Random things I dislike

This has also been published in World of Moms!


What I’ve learnt from the unsaid actions of established veteran bloggers I know is that when you run out of ideas or have a blogger’s block (if that’s legitimate), you make lists. As I’d always have been, I have more things to crib about than to smile at. No, not always, I was a better person as a child. Nevertheless, now. And so, I set out.

1.     Hierarchical baritone

This is serious. I passionately dislike, even hate, people who you can just overhear making a telephonic conversation and you can guess, cent percent, if he or she is talking to someone junior or senior in the social or professional strata. Argh, haven’t your parents taught you manners?

2.     “Oh, so you are a feminist?”

Yes, I fucking am. Very much. And if you are not, you might want to check out its meaning first.

3.     “Don’t talk to me about your kid” people

Don’t talk to me at all, then! Ok, 1..2..3.. calmed down. Let me explain. I talking about something I’m excited about should not mean peer pressure for you. Just like you telling me about your last LBD does not mean I will rush to buy one or sit, sigh and crib. It’s yours, tell me more, very nice, thank you. That’s mine, the kid, I will tell you as much as I think I should, be nice, thank you. Else, let’s catch up sometime else when I have grown over her. If, ever, at all.

4.     “Don’t tell me you’re a working Mom” people

Same reason as above. You tell me your recipes, I tell you my office canteen menu, finish. Else, again, let’s catch up later on, thank you.

PS: Oh wait. No I am neither a single Mom, nor is it because my household won’t run without my paycheck. It because, I am, I fucking am, this way. And, proud to be, that too.

PPS: If you have any concerns about how well my kid is growing up, check it out for yourself. Here!

5.     Socialites.

Because I envy them. Period.

Our first PTM!

This article has also been published in Women's Web, World of Moms! and a magazine.


I was ready to take the blame. I was ready to own it all up, before they would even start. In my wild imagination, I even pictured myself joining my hands as I would tell them all about it; but of course, better sense prevailed.

It was our first ever Parent Teacher Meeting, PTM as they call it these days. I was, to say the least, nervous.

It should not have been our first, which is, well, the first blow I was expecting.

Everyone around seems to make babies, and recently I made one too…

This has also been published at World of Moms! and a magazine.


Everyone around seems to make babies. Those who sleep and eat on the open roadside make them in dozens. And what’s the big deal – they’ll grow up only to become another you or another me, or worse still, another of that guy who we together spent hours cursing at. Yes babies are cute, we love to cuddle them but isn’t that true for a puppy as well for that matter..?. so, what’s so special?