Why it is not easy to take sides on the recent Supreme Court ruling!

(This article was first published in Feministaa)

It is tempting to have an opinion on everything, as it gets you facetime across the screen with several people from across the globe. They may like you or hate you, but ignore they cannot, for you have a valuable Facebook profile, a Twitter handle, and a whole series of I-know-better proclamations in place. Especially when you have an issue that is easy to stand by and take sides upon, it’s a cakewalk. You know what to say, and you know the predictable pat backs on the way all too well. I run a Facebook group around the theme of Equality, which really, in many frequent threads, stand to vouch more for the equation of gender equality than of other forms. So, it was easy for me to hit the share the scream and outcry of gross injustice and I’d know that I’d have unquestioned weight of support on my side. And yet, I found it not easy at all to reach my own conclusions on this subject.

It is on us, Parents. It is on us! - PART 2

This is in continuation to my previous article, which you can read HERE!

(This too was first published at Feministaa)

Talking of bodies and touches, as parents the other things we need to keep a watch on are these:

TONE!!

Something we need to keep in mind as we interact with our kids on these issues is that – we need to keep the conversation LIGHT AND EASY!

Why we owe Co-Education to our next?

This post was first posted in Feministaa.



Every morning we’re hard hit with headlines screeching gender crimes, and I won’t even go into statistical figures there. Every morning, we’re also served morning tea in bed by the mother, the bahu, or the dewrani. Point is, academicians in contextual gender fields have a point when they argue that the previous two sentences you just read are not really distinct, irrelevant and erratic – they actually form parts of the same spectrum. The spectrum that cries out to us right since we’re born, that we are different. Boys and girls, the “us” and the “them”!
Curious, right?

A small step "Together"

It had all began with a rather morbid news, that a 4 year old was sexually assaulted. I was not too surprised that it happened, to be honest. I was shocked, rather, to imagine how many must be happening behind the curtain, unnoticed, unreported, unacknowledged just so that one piece among them could surface up to grab half a column on the daily news. The groups on social media were flooding with demands and disputes around school's intervention in matters of CCTV, female attendant, while I was cringing to think how the 4 year old never came back home to tell it to her mother, because she was either scared or didn't even know it was wrong...

I had put forward an outcry which was more at spur of moment than was purposeful. I had asked if we could arrange a workshop to tell kids and parents what they should know! But they gave me hope, and shoulders. The enthusiasm since last week was absolutely heartening. What was just a musing became an idea, and then a purpose. We formed a team, and we named ourselves "Together". We stole our kids crayon boxes and made posters while they were away at school. We painted the mailboxes and WhatsApp groups red... 

নারীবাদ vs নারী বাদ

Guest-post, by Anirban. On International Women's Day!

“পুত্র রাজনীতি বড় কূট। এবয়সে তা বুঝবেনা। বোঝবার চেষ্টা কোরোনা।” আজকের মহম্মদ হয়ে বড় জানতে ইচ্ছা করে, রাজনীতি কি শুধু সংসদ, বিধানসভা ও নানান জনপ্রতিনিধি সভাতেই সীমাবদ্ধ? স্কুল, অফিস, কাছারির থেকেও যে রাজনীতি প্রাচীন ও চিরকালীন – সেহল "রান্নাঘরের রাজনীতি"। রান্নার ব্যবস্থা, রন্ধনপ্রণালী, রান্না করা খাবারের ভাগ সবকিছুর মধ্যেই যে তীব্র রাজনীতির আকর সেই রাজনীতিই এ সমাজের পুরুষতন্ত্রের আকর। 

নিজেদের প্রাধান্য টিকিয়ে রাখার এহেন পন্থা অসামান্য। “খিড়কি থেকে সিংহদুয়ার” এ বেধে দাও।তারপর নিজেরাই “সাস ভি কভি বহু থি” হয়ে আমরা যা পাইনি তা তোমরা পাবে না নীতিতে চলে যাবে। “ঘরের লক্ষ্মী”, “মাতৃরূপিনী” এসব ছেড়ে কি নারীকে রক্তমাংসের একজন মানুষ হিসেবে ভাবতে খুব অসুবিধা? সে দেবী নয়, সে বেশ্যা নয় – আমার মত একজন মানুষ। এত insecurity কিসের? জন্মানোর আগেই ভ্রূণ অবস্থাতেই মেরে ফেলো! ছোটবেলা থেকেই তাদের মাথায় ঢুকিয়ে দাও তারা নিকৃষ্ট! জীবনের অন্যতম মোক্ষ বিয়ে আর স্বামীর ঘর।

Just a joke, you'd say!

Below is a picture that I just received, as I tapped on the Wi-Fi icon on my handheld and the Whatsapp messages flooded in. 

The photo is labeled as: “ladies enjoying cappuccino, policeman relishing latte” and has been enthusiastically been followed up with emoticons that shed tears of laughter and rolled on the floor, in ecstasy.

Working Women's Pregnancy - A running thought!

This has also been published in Women's Web and MyCity4Kids!!


I just watched a small video which is being shared widely in social media, which is below:

WATCH THE VIDEO!

And, here's my reaction to the same (I am copy pasting, actually, directly from what I just wrote in the "comment" box of the video, without any edits.) -



I loved, and more loved the fact that somebody thought about it and made it, and yet I cannot but wonder…


Is the only way to prove is to deny your body the changes, the rest it demands, those morning sicknesses and hormonal upheaval... and the only way to women empowerment is just to HAVE TO put up a strong brave face and make sure to be around as if it's all absolutely the same?

Still Alice - a Film Review!

This article has also been published in Women's Web!


This is going to be a rather morbid post, I promise you!

When I had sat myself down to watch this movie, I was uninitiated, totally uninitiated. Of course, I had chosen it only because Julianne Moore, who played the protagonist in it, won herself the Oscar for it. Little did I have a notion of what to look for, what to think of it. But, having watched the gripping tale of “Still Alice”, all I can say is – it truly has been a lesson, at least. A lesson that, one, can really never learn!

How?

Menses - let it just be!

This post has also been published in The Huffington Post and Women's Web

"What is Durga Puja?" - they had asked!

This article has also been published at The Speaking Tree, Youthkiawaaz, WhatsupIndia, Gurgaon Moms and Women's Web!!


Now, strange things happen at times at most habitual moments. Like when they asked you to tell them "something about yourself" at your first job interview, and you looked blank. You did not know, until then, how difficult it could be to be asked to summarise your own self, in precise words and well-formed sentences, conclusively and sufficiently! You do not know where to start, what to carefully keep aside, what is just yours and not for the world to know, and what preciseness of the reply would fit the bill right, that is, to leave your audience engaged and pleased and to still be honest and at it. When confronted with casual curiosity, or even courtesy-calls, on something so damn close to you that you've grown up to belong to it or to be it yourself, it really gets bad. I know I am getting too gibberish for you to keep on reading this piece, especially in a season where you've so much to otherwise, and I duly apologise. Give me a chance to defend.

I'm just back from a very sudden going-total-blank-at-a-most-obvious-question situation at a non-Bong gathering. They casually, only slightly curiously, had just asked me one simple well-meaning question:

"What is Durga Puja?"

5 Ways To Raise Your Kid Gender Neutral

This article has been cross-published at The Huffington Post, YouthkiAwaaz, Mycity4kids and Women's Web.

1. Don’t buy them blue or pink.

The other day, my four year old asked, yet again:– Mum, are you sure?– Sure of what?– That pink is not the colour for girls, and blue for boys?– Yes, dear.

I took her to the balcony as we talked:
– Look at the sky. What colour do you see?
– Blue. Light blue.
– Now tell me, is the sky there only for boys? Does it shine or rain only for them and not us?
– No!